[From Rick Marken (940407.2230)]
Dag Forssell (940307 1120) --
Based on how you imagine your wife to react, you "choose" to perceive
your wife to be warm and friendly or a cold fish, and act accordingly.
My point is that common usage of the word "perceive" involves both
supplementation from imagination and review of multiple scenarios in
thinking imagination. Either is poorly modeled at present, but seem real
enough in life, and fit the model as far as I can tell.
I think I see why the applied types seem to have so little use for us
"stick wigglers" and modellers. You don't really think PCT is relevant
to your "real world" concerns. Everything in your post "sounds" great --
but it is only tangentially related to the PCT model; it certainly nothing
to do with anything we have tested or modelled (as you admit). The only place
"changing perceptions" comes into PCT is during reorganization; we haven't
modelled it or studied it. What little we know about it suggests that it
can't be don't systematically and it certainly doesn't guarantee a solution
to conflict. You can imagine your wife to be warm, and end up treating her
as though she were, but the actual feedback you get may still be shrewish.
Control of imagination is a lot easier than control of perception -- and
those of us who are forced to live in the ral world must deal with a
world of perception -- rubber, road and all.
It seems to me that the basic message of PCT -- what we actually do
know -- can be quite useful. There is no need to retreat into the
make believe world of Pop Psych in order to make a contribution. PCT
really works. What we know from PCT can be explained very simply. People
control perceptual variables -- all people, including you, Mr. Therapist
and you, Mr Manager. People want things to be the way they want them.
This is bound to lead to conflicts;conflict is nearly inevitable when many
different control systems, whether in the same person or in different people,
want the same or similar things to be in slightly differnet states. The
only certain way to eliminate conflict is to change what YOU want. PCT
suggests ways to go about doing this; it shows what it means to want,
how you achieve your wants, what determines what you want (higher
order wants). While it is possible to eliminate conflict by changing
your perception of what you want, this is not guaranteed to produce
a solution; moreover, the new way of perceiving is likely to produce new
and unanticipated conflicts. Problem solving means learning "how to want"
-- finding your Buddha nature.
PCT can help us deal with other people, to some extent, but the main
person PCT helps us deal with is ourselves. All we can do about other
people is understand that they are autonomous systems themselves, that
there is no way to control them, that conflicts between people are likely,
that, again, the only way we can deal with a conflict with others is by
changing OURSELVES, that people will go through periods of reorganization
when we can provide reassurance but no help toward solving their problem.
PCT provides a methodology -- for working "on the motorcycle that is
yourself". PCT can be taught so that it can be used by others as a
technique, like Zen, for making oneself better though regular PCT
maintainance. PCT is not something that can be used to fix other
people; you can't fix other people; only yourself -- that's one of
the lessons of PCT. Another lesson is that you can't help WANTING to
fix other people; this is a want you have to learn to change.
PCT does suggest ways to help you get along with others; but it doesn't
provide techniques for "making the business successful" or "making the
kids behave well"; these are just side effects of treating people
like people.
What is usually called "discipline" is, in PCT, simply people doing their
best to control their OWN perceptions. There is nothing wrong with disciple
except believing that it is "good" for the disciplinee. Discipline is
just a way of controlling; it's fine as long as it works (for you -- like
when the kid is small enough); but if you do it as a matter of priciple,
with a system that can also perceive and control principles, you are
no longer controlling; you are creating conflict.
As I write this I am realizing that R. Pirsig's "Zen and the Art of
Motorcycle Maintenance" is probably one of the best Applied PCT books
written to date.
PCT is not about how to make OTHER PEOPLE better; it's about how to make
one'self better. PCT is the bell that tolls for THEE.
Best
Buddha