# Freedom From Stress?

**URL:** <http://discourse.iapct.org/t/freedom-from-stress/4562>\
**Category:** CSG1995\
**Created:** [August 27, 1995, 1:21am UTC](http://discourse.iapct.org/t/freedom-from-stress/4562 "1995-08-27T01:21:01Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 1\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Richard\_Marken](http://discourse.iapct.org/letter_avatar_proxy/v4/letter/r/9fc348/32.png) [@Richard\_Marken](http://discourse.iapct.org/u/Richard_Marken)\
**Post date:** [August 27, 1995, 1:21am UTC](http://discourse.iapct.org/t/freedom-from-stress/4562/1 "1995-08-27T01:21:01Z")

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> From Rick Marken (950826.1820)]

Ed Ford (950826.daytime) --

> Rick, you have a way of taking what a person says, twisting it to your  
> own meaning, then being very sarcastic and cruel.

I humbly apologize for my sarcasm if it hurt you. That was certainly  
not my intent.

> This is one applications person who no longer will tolerate your  
> sarcasm.

That's up to you. But I will understand and tolerate your sarcasm and  
cruelty if you choose to stay. You're responding to disturbances and so  
am I; it's all just PCT:-)

> When I suggested you try running an inner city school, you said "It's  
> just not my calling." Fine. What is your calling?

Apparently my calling has become "studying and teaching PCT". I was  
not being sarcastic when I said that running an inner city school is not  
my calling. I meant it. I couldn't do it. But I certainly admire people  
who run (and, especially, who teach in) inner city schools.

> How many people, at work, on the net, or elsewhere, have shown a  
> sustained interest in PCT because of what you've done?

I have no idea. Maybe one or two, at best.

By the way, you weren't being abusive there, were you? 😉

> It is just not worth staying on the net and subjecting myself to your  
> abusive remarks. It really isn't? I think there are a lot of former  
> participants on the net that would say the same thing.

It sounds to me like you are saying that there are a lot of former  
participants on the net who are no longer participants because I have  
subjected them to abusive remarks. Can you see how a person (like  
myself) who doesn't think of themselves as "abusive" might perceive  
your statement as "abusive".

I don't perceive your statement as abusive, however, because, if I did, it  
would just create stress. But I have read "Freedom from Stress" and on  
p. 14 the author explains how to avoid stress like this by developing a  
positive perception of the person who makes the critical remarks. This  
is how Bob was able to feel less stress when his wife, Betty, who would  
always say that everything he did was wrong. Bob paid attention to what  
he liked about Betty and ignored her corrections of his unintentional  
disturbances to what he was controlling.

I hardly notice your corrections to my unintentional disturbances to  
what you are controlling because I perceive you as a nice guy who is  
really trying to understand PCT and help kids with real problems.

I wish you could deal with me the way you suggested that Bob deal  
with Betty. Like Bob, I think you might find that you get less upset  
when it seems that, like Betty, I say that everything you do is wrong.  
I suggest that you read Ch. 2 of "Freedom From Stress". It will help;-)

Best

Rick