Why did the chicken cross the road?

[From Rick Marken (960109.2030)]

Here is an edited version of apost that I got from my sister-in-law.
I added my own entry at the end.

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

Plato: For the greater good.

Karl Marx: It was a historical inevitability.

Thomas de Torquemada: Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll
find out.

Douglas Adams: Forty-two.

B.F. Skinner: Crossing behavior was selected by the chicken's
unique history of reinforcement.

Jean-Paul Sartre: In order to act in good faith and be true to
itself, the chicken found it necessary to cross the road.

Ludwig Wittgenstein: The possibility of "crossing" was encoded into
the objects "chicken" and "road," and circumstances came into being
which caused the actualization of this potential occurrence.

Buddha: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-nature.

Emily Dickinson: Because it could not stop for death.

Epicurus: For fun.

Johann Friedrich von Goethe: The eternal hen-principle made it do
it.

Pyrrho the Skeptic: What road?

Henry David Thoreau: To live deliberately ... and suck all the
marrow out of life.

William T. Powers: To get to the other side.

(After testing for the controlled variable, of course)

Best

Rick