What is a lie?
A psychologist may explain it in terms of behavior -- communication of
disinformation, either by omission or by giving a total "bullshit" answer.
Example:
"No, offissser I have not been drinking."
"Well, you were weaving in your car."
"No, offissser, can't be."
"I can't even needle point."
A good sales person -- will always tell the truth (as he "sees" it). A good
sales person will FINISH an answer to a question, to his self. Yes, this was
a good deal (for ME). All credit applications will be accepted (but not all
credit applications will be approved). A product is rarely ever sold -- the
perception of value of the product is what is being sold.
The car is safer, faster, more reliable, or perhaps it will help you pick up
chicks. Always address the wants needs and desires of the customer -- help
REDUCE their error signals. After all the error must be very large, to spend
their weekend talking with car sales men.
SALES 101 Always use FAB. (Feature Advantage and Benefit --- There is no
point talking about a feature if you don't explain what the advantage and
benefits are to the customer. )
The TEST - the best way to tell if a sales person is lying? Are their lips
moving?
Is lying always wrong? Why?
Nope lying has many benefits for self and others. For anyone who has the
intention and principal -- to do no harm. In other words don't make things
worse.
Examples of lying to others:
Santa Clause and the Easter Bunny. (My apology to anyone who still believes in
them, I was just kidding they really do exist)
Honey, does this dress make me look fat? (There is almost never a good answer
to this, without lying.)
Not now, I have a headache. (I don't want to explain this one)
Example lying to self:
I am going to stop smoking this year. (which might happen only after I am
dead)
...... and I firmly believe to sin no more..... (Driving out of the church
parking lot, someone changes lanes without signaling and nearly hits you --
Suddenly you invoke God's name in a way it was not meant to be used.)
Are some people liars and others not?
Yes, without a doubt. Typically less intelligent people are liars. Because,
first you must be caught in a lie before some can perceive you as a liar. To
be more fair some people are just better liars and don't get caught as often.
They tend use the extremes of interpreting an event. Either extremely vague
or concrete, either of which can serve their purposes of trying to create a
Misperception in the interviewer or audience.
For Example, Vague terms
No, I did not have "sexual relations" with....
The perception of the words "sexual relations" sounds so close to "Sexual
Relationship" one is lead to believe, their was no relationship of a sexual
nature. Instead of meaning I did not have intercorse with her. Although, this
was not a lie in grammar or sentence structure, the interpretation of the
terms, is where and why people felt like they were lied to by the Pres.
For Example Concrete Thinking
"No, I did not have a 11 yr. affair with Jennifer Flowers." This was not a
lie either, just careful phrasing. He later admitted to having a 10 yr. and 9
months, affair with her. He did not denied having the affair, his contention
was about the time frame.
We all lie at one time or another. There is no insult, crime, value, or harm
in the behavior of lying. In short there is nothing good nor bad about lying.
The key to it is NOT in the behavior, of lying, but in the motives and
intentions. Are you sparing feelings, having a surprise party, saving time
and energy? Are you covering your ass, will it cost some one something they
can't afford, are you deceiving yourself.
As always, intentions are more important than behaviors, in defining a human
being.
MARK "I'm not Lying about nothing" LAZARE